Day 32 - The Healing Power of Laughter

June 1st - Day 32 

Our Little Cabin in the Woods

Our house was falling down but instead of working on it we built a little cabin in the woods were Robin could shoot his pellet gun.  He would shoot and I would read a book.  We put in a wood stove that we got from our friend Geezer.  There was no electricity so it was lit with candles.  So many wonderful hours were spent in this cabin.  

While Robin was shooting we would drink a bottle of wine or he would have beer and I would have cider and the ideas would start to spill out of our heads.  They usually involved crazy ideas for a videos we could do together or when he was at camp.

We would laugh and laugh as they were so ridiculous.  I always had a piece of paper with scribbles everywhere as we walked up to the house.  

So many wonderful hours of laughter and fun were spent together in this cabin.  I miss laughing with Robin so much, he was so much fun and so was I.

Here is a video I took of Robin and his friend John singing in the cabin.  So many, many hours of solace and fun were had in this little cabin.

Arzua to Monte del Gozo - 34.4 km

Christian and I decided, that we would walk together starting in the morning as it was our last day of walking. We would go to Monte del Gozo which was only 5 km from Santiago so we could get to Santiago first thing in the morning when the line to get our Compestela would be short. The albergue in Monte del Gozo has 500 beds so we are not too worried about not getting a bed. Actually it has been even easier then before the 100 km mark. So many people join in on the pilgrimage at Sarria as it is only 100 km from Santiago. To get a compestela you need to walk at least 100km. Large groups of people suddenly appeared and we thought the albergues would be filled to the brim but there are many, many more albergues to accommodate the additional pilgrims.

We had to stop and wait today as a very large group of young teens passed us as they were so loud we couldnʼt even hear ourselves talk. Christian says in his German accent, “Quiet....quiet please on the Camino so we can hear the birds.” It made me laugh. I donʼt think they understood him. But I laughed a lot. I think I laugh so much as I am always overtired so all the ridiculous things he says I find so funny as they are like what young school children laugh at. But the laughing has healed my heart. I thought after Robin died I needed so many things to make me happy but now after I have laughed so much I realize that is what I needed. Robin and I always laughed and laughed a lot. Laughter was what I was missing most of all.

I had no technology on this pilgrimage and I am glad I made that choice but now walking with Christian I saw the benefits of having his phone for his music.  Christian played his music to me and sang and I told him my favourite songs and we sang some more.  Music has an amazing ability to heal the soul.  I love listening to people sing.  When Christian was young, him and his friends had a boy band so I enjoyed being his audience as we walked.  Songs hold so many memories and as we reminisced about our favourite songs and the memories they evoked.

The second stop of the day was the coolest cafe of the whole trip. It was a large cafe and as you approached you could hear the music. They were playing Queen “We Are The Champions”. It felt so empowering. Talk about fun memories flooding back with this best of the Queen soundtrack intensifying our mood of exhilaration.  Inside there were t-shirts hung from the ceilings from all over the world. So many pilgrims had been here and enjoyed the ambiance. Joseph caught up with us here and we all sang, ate and had fun. We took a group photo and I began to cry. I knew we were coming to the end. It feels so sad.

We took today slow. Even through it was 34 km we enjoyed our time together with our Camino family. We even met a new woman from Ireland named Laura, she came in at 100 km so we no longer made fun of these late starting pilgrims. Everyone is on their own journey and who are we to judge. Now that we have no problem getting a bed at night there is no fear that they will effect our Camino experience. We made 5 stops today, sitting and talking with everyone and relaxing and taking it slow, relishing in every step. We made it to the albergue at 17:00. 

The people that got in earlier went directly to Santiago so us late comers are the beginning of the people staying for the night.

Everyone was enjoying each others company. I was so tired and so emotional already I was worried what I was going to be like tomorrow. After dinner Christian and I went up to a sculpture on a hill of two large pilgrims that point their way to Santiago. Mix the Slovakian woman told us of this place. It was worth staying here for the night because this sculpture is not on the path of our pilgrimage. After posing for some pictures we headed back to the albergue. I feel like I am back in a fog as I knew the end is near. 

The healing power of laughter

Remembering laughing with Robin and laughing with Christian makes me happy.  Missing them is much lighter when I laugh about things.  I miss Robin and wish he was here with me but when I am laughing I remember what it feels like to be with Robin.  Life was always light when he made me laugh. I am given people and situations that make me feel good, feel the love through the laughter.  Then adding some music to the mix it heightens any experience.  With Robin there was always music.  Music  and laughter fill those holes that I thought could never be filled.  There are songs that come on the radio or play on my ipod and I feel like Robin is right here with me.  

That is the only reason I wish I would have had my phone now so that I could have listened to music with the back drop of Spain.  Now that the pain is gone I feel the power and energy of love and all the things that I love; such as music and laughter and people and new experiences.  Ahhhh this is living.  What a wonderful gift Robin gave me, gave all of us, to really feel and appreciate what it is to live.  We aren't in these bodies for very long. The time will come and will go.  The people that go before us are the teachers and we are the learners.  We are learning to live, to feel and to experience emotions.  I know I will be in spirit form one day and I will not have a body to experience these emotions and I will thank Robin, I will thank Zoel, I will thank my grandparents and my pets.  I will thank them for showing me what love is and what it feels like.  

I love to tell my stories as they make me laugh, they make me laugh a lot and still so many I haven't told.  Every day I think up a story of something Robin did.  I haven't told the stories of when he was not with me as I didn't want to take the privilege and the honour away from the other people in Robin's life that will be telling stories of him until they die.  He will live on in the stories, he will live on in the laughter.  Life is good.